The Pattern

As I work through the Couch to 5K program, I’m seeing a pattern develop:

Step 1:  Look at the upcoming week’s schedule, which gets progressively more challenging, and think to myself “There’s no way I can do that.  Well, there goes the running idea!”

Step 2: Spend Monday, my appointed “Day 1”, swinging between dread and beating myself up for being such a defeatist.

Step 3:  Get home from work and dash upstairs to change into gear and program the new workout into my timer, trying to pump myself up with thoughts of the beer I will have when I finish, and how good it will feel to stretch after the run is over.

Step 4:  Climb onto the treadmill and begin, focusing only on the movement of my feet, and whatever show I’ve thrown on for distraction.

Step 5:  Through the first (shorter) run interval, thinking “That wasn’t so bad”.

Step 5:  Through the second (longer) run interval, thinking “If I can’t get through the next round, at least I did it once!”

Step 6: Through the second short interval, thinking “Almost there, almost there, almost there!”

Step 7: Through the final interval, mentally bargaining and bribing myself to Keep Going, Keep Going, Keep Going!

Step 8: Victorious!  Triumphant!  Enjoy my stretch, unable to wipe a big, goofy grin off my face that I did it!

Step 9: Complete Day 2 & 3 without dread, knowing that if I did it once, I can do it again.

Step 10: Begin the cycle all over again.

Maybe one of these days I will be confident enough to step up to the next week’s challenge without fear, but honestly, the payoff of overcoming the fear and exceeding my own expectations is worth the anxiety.  In the meantime, I will continue to let the pattern repeat itself for five more weeks, knowing that I will get there in the end…